My heart is a whore. I am always having crushes and falling in love way to fast. Maybe just mistaking infatuation for love. Lust for love. I love sex. I love being touched. I also love my alone time. Jerry and I have been a mess coming out of this pandemic. He quit drinking again. He wants to put the ring back on my finger this weekend at the beach. My heart isn't in it. I like having him there. I enjoy our sessions of passion. The rest of my life?
He sent me a barrage of text messages while I was sleeping. He is so insecure. He also brought much of this on himself. I am to blame by not saying anything sooner. We do not know how to communicate. This weekend will be raw and healing one way or another.
On the periphery there are others. New crushes with promise and old flames wanting to reignite. Part of me wants to play with them all. To enjoy them all. I also do not want to hurt anyone. Then I want to be left alone.
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