Once

 "Once,  

I ran from fear  

so fear controlled me.  

Until I learned to hold fear  

like a newborn.  

Listen to it,  

but not give in.  

Honour it,  

but not worship it.  

Fear could not stop me  

anymore.  

I walked with courage  

into the storm.  

I still have fear,  

but it does not have me.

Once,  

I was ashamed of who I was.  

I invited shame into my heart.  

I let it burn.  

It told me, "I am only trying  

to protect your vulnerability."  

I thanked shame dearly,  

and stepped into life anyway,  

unashamed,  

with shame as a lover.

Once,  

I had great sadness  

buried deep inside.  

I invited it to come out and play.  

I wept oceans.  

My tear ducts ran dry.  

And I found joy right there.  

Right at the core of my sorrow.  

It was heartbreak that taught  

me how to love.

Once,  

I had anxiety.  

A mind that wouldn't stop.  

Thoughts that wouldn't be silent.  

So I stopped trying to  

silence them.  

And I dropped out of the mind,  

and into the Earth.  

Into the mud.  

Where I was held strong  

like a tree,  

unshakeable,  

safe.

Once,  

anger burned in the depths.  

I called anger into the light  

of myself.  

I felt its shocking power.  

I let my heart pound  

and my blood boil.  

Listened to it,  

finally.  

And it screamed,  

"Respect yourself fiercely now!"  

"Speak your truth with passion!"  

"Say no when you mean no!"  

"Walk your path with courage!"  

"Let no one speak for you!"  

Anger became an honest friend.  

A truthful guide.  

A beautiful wild child.

Once,  

loneliness cut deep.  

I tried to distract  

and numb myself.  

Ran to people and places  

and things.  

Even pretended I was "happy."  

But soon I could not run anymore.  

And I tumbled into the heart  

of loneliness.  

And I died and was reborn  

into an exquisite solitude  

and stillness that connected me  

to all things.  

So I was not lonely,  

but alone with All Life.  

My heart One with all other hearts.

Once,  

I ran from difficult feelings.  

Now, they are my advisors,  

confidants, friends,  

and they all have a home in me,  

and they all belong  

and have dignity.  

I am sensitive, soft, fragile,  

my arms wrapped around  

all my inner children.  

And in my sensitivity, power.  

In my fragility,  

an unshakeable presence.

In the depths of my wounds,  

in what I had named “darkness,”  

I found a blazing Light  

that guides me now in battle.  

I became a warrior  

when I turned towards myself.  

:sparkles:  

And started listening."

:fire: Jeff Foster, How I Became A Warrior  

:art: Carlos Quevedo, Celestial Warrior